Double Life
by Fifth Horseman
Summary: One Hour One Shot per EvSoc's challenge. An, EvaBleach cross, hopefully good for at least a mild chuckle.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion or Bleach or anything associated with them. I'm just here to play.

A One Hour One Shot in response to the challenge from EvSoc. It's an Eva/Bleach crossover.

I have no clue where the hell this idea came from. It just popped into my head and wouldn't leave me alone.

Hopefully you'll get chuckle out of it. Or at least a groan.

**Double Life**

Standing on the roof of a damaged apartment building, a lone individual stood surveying the damage from the battle. The day had finally come, just as he knew it would. It was the day he had been waiting for, the day he had trained so hard for, and now his services would finally be needed.

The coming of the Angels.

He had watched the battle between the Angel and the purple Evangelion, biding his time and waiting for his chance to do his thing. He could see displaced human souls wandering the streets below him, but sending them on to the afterlife was a job for other Shinigami. He had one given task in the city of Tokyo 3 and it was to dispatch the souls of dead Angels.

He and others of his ilk knew something that these foolish humans did not. They thought that the information they had culled from the Secret Dead Sea Scrolls told them everything they needed to know about the Angels. They were wrong. What they didn't know was that a dead Angel's soul would return as a Hollow and would devour every human soul it could in order to become stronger. It would seek to unite with the souls of other Angel Hollows in order to get rid of these pesky humans. If they could not defeat them in life, they would do so in death.

Preventing this, was the duty of this one, lone Shinigami. And he was ready.

The battle had been over for several hours and he had waited quietly and patiently on the rooftop. Finally, he could feel the presence of the Hollow as it came back into this world. Bouncing across the rooftops with blinding quickness, the small Death God hurried to the Hollow's point of entry, alighting atop a lamp post in front his foe.

The Hollow form of Sachiel was nearly identical to its living form. Its bony, bird-like face was the same, only a starker shade of white and the place where its core used to be was now just an open hole through its body. It was also only about one third of its original size. The destruction of its core had severely depleted its soul energy and its current form was the largest it could manifest.

Sachiel roared loudly as he fully emerged into the human world. He sensed the spiritual power of the Shinigami that was waiting for him and turned to face his new foe. When he saw him, he began to laugh.

"This is it? One tiny little soul reaper? You're hardly worth my time. Although, I am hungry and you will make a tasty snack!"

Sachiel's right arm shot out, ripping the lamp post out of the sidewalk, but he was surprised when all he got was the now crumpled and twisted piece of metal. His enemy was now calmly watching him from the roof of the store directly in front of him, its gaze steady and impassive. The defeated Angel raised his left arm, intending to spear the Soul Reaper with the lance in his forearm, but again he missed. Just as the lance shot out and was about to smash into the roof's edge, the Shinigami effortlessly leapt into the air, drew his Zanpakuto, and neatly severed Sachiel's arm at the elbow.

Sachiel shrieked in pain as dark blue blood spurted from the wound, painting the storefront and the sidewalk. He spun around to try and spot his enemy, but caught only a flash of black and white as it passed through the pool of light of another streetlight and into the shadows beyond.

"Just for that I'll kill you slowly!" he bellowed.

The Death God didn't respond from his new perch on the rooftop behind Sachiel as he regarded him with his penetrating, unwavering gaze. He never conversed with his enemies during battle and spent little time listening to what they had to say. Their words were meant to distract, but he was too much of a professional to fall for that trick. He was one of the best at what he did and he had no time for useless theatrics.

PenPen silently sprang from the roof towards his enemy, his Zanpakuto held ready over his head. He was too quick for his enemy and Sachiel roared in frustration as he saw his death coming. The blade easily sliced through the bony mask and the former Angel began to disintegrate.

"Wark!" the diminutive Death God spoke as he sheathed his Zanpakuto. In seconds the Hollow was gone.

Satisfied with his night's work, PenPen leapt to the rooftop and Flash Stepped his way home. If he hurried he could grab a hot bath and a cold beer before his purple haired housemate came home and beat him to it.

* * *

Maybe it's just me, but the idea of PenPen as a Soul Reaper was just too good not to use. 

This is what happens when I have too little sleep and way too much coffee.

And if you feel like needlessly flaming this, do me a favour and go light yourself on fire.


End file.
